The people who know me well know that I am a perpetually planned out person. In fact, I think it’s Matt’s least favorite personality trait of mine. He loves to live spontaneously, going out on random trips on a whim, never being planned more than an hour at a time (I don’t know how he does it as a teacher, but he does). I, however, would have my day planned down to the last second if that wouldn’t make me totally and completely crazy. I just like to know what I’m going to be doing + when I’m going to be doing it.
Being the planned out person that I am, you would think that knowing when labor was going to start would be reassuring. I assure you, it is not. I am a complete ball of nerves. I have cried more times than I care to admit. I have doubted my abilities to give birth + be a mom more than a few times. I am literally shaking in my
boots running shoes knowing that TODAY, I will be in the hospital with my husband, dealing with contractions, and hopefully sooner-than-later pushing out this little girl I have grown so attached to in the last 9 months. (OK, that last part might happen tomorrow, but you get the point.)
In the next 48 hours, our life will be completely changed. I will go from feeling kicks in my stomach to holding a baby in my arms. Someone will now be dependent on us to care for her every second of every day. This morning was the last morning we will wake up together without a child in the house for the next 18 years.
We “check in” at the hospital this afternoon. I’ve been waiting for this day the past 9 months. Admittedly, I am scared to death, but I know that every wince of pain I experience and every doubt I have had will vanish once my baby is in my arms.
Thank you for your continued thoughts and prayers. While I can’t promise to keep everyone up-to-date on Facebook + Twitter, I will hopefully have some sort of announcement tomorrow, although it might be much, much later than my usually posts. We have appreciated all the words of encouragement and can’t wait for you to be able to meet our baby also!