nearing the end

13 months.  13 months of breastfeeding and our time together is starting to come to an end.

The Concrete Runner - The End of Breastfeeding (1)

Miles has been a champ eater since day one.  He latched on immediately and we honestly haven’t had a hiccup since.  At least not on Miles’ end of the deal.  I haven’t exactly come out of this scratch-free, with low supply issues (thanks to genetics) and of course some soreness.  But, otherwise, it has been a pretty successful 13 months of breastfeeding.

About a month ago, we cut out all feedings except first thing in the morning and before bed.  But lately, those feedings have been getting shorter and shorter.  So, I decided to see what would happen without a morning feeding this past weekend.  And I must say, Miles has handled it with flying colors.

But, with only one feeding a day now, nearing the end of breastfeeding certainly does not come easy – at least not for me.  We are pretty sure Miles is going to be our last baby, so the thought of this being the end of breastfeeding for me is a little sad.  While I’m thrilled to sleep in an extra 30 minutes in the morning now, I will definitely miss the closeness with my baby.  I love being able to sit there and hold him without having him try to squirm away from me.  I love watching how peaceful he is.  I just plain love the time that I’ve been able to spend with him the last 13 months.

So, I’m a little sad that I’m not going to have that time with him anymore.  All these little phases and milestones that we are reaching, while I love reaching them (we’ve been trying for weeks to get him to walk – with no success yet) are just reminders that this is the end of the baby phase for our family.  No more first smiles, first laughs, first crawling, first foods, etc.  And, let’s be real here, it’s also a reminder of how much harder things get as my baby reaches the toddler stage.


So, I’m a little sad.  I’m a little sad not to be able to hold my little guy first thing in the morning.  But, while having another toddler is scary, I’m ready to see Miles grow into a little boy.  I’m ready to hear his first sentence, his stories, to see him run around the backyard, to play catch with him outside.  So, I’ll be sad, but I know there are so many more things to look forward to in the future.  And heck, I’ve still got a little bit longer to hold him to nurse at night, and I’ll be taking full advantage of that!

[Tweet “The sadness that comes when you near the end of breastfeeding your last baby…”]

  • laura

    Wow– Reading this was like reading my thoughts! My son just turned 1 last week– still nursing and still pumping (though down from 5 sessions a day to 3) He’s our 2nd and last and I am not ready and I don’t know if he is but the thought of not nursing him makes me sad…